When people ask me how are you doing? I can feel a devious grin come across my face and at the tip of my tongue is "How's the diarrhea?" It makes me laugh. God knows I love to laugh.
God has given us a gift - Not brain cancer but a door to talk to people about him through brain cancer. Yesterday, I had a conversation with a neighbor across the street and she said, "How are y'all doing? How is Jonathan? Is everything okay?" My response, "Everything is fine. Jonathan does have brain cancer and we start treatment next week but God is bigger than this." The conversation can go two ways, they either cry and I talk about how God has prepared us for this or They know God and I cry.
This morning I woke up, threw my surrender flag, gave the day to God-"Your will, Your way," and asked him what he needed me to do for him today. His response- talk about me. Have a conversation.
I'll be honest, a month ago, when God gave me the nudge to talk about him I would always say, "God, that is a little awkward and offensive just to bring up to strangers. I'm not sure how to do that gracefully. What if I just went to the gym and did some squats for you? Squats are hard and they leave you sore, how about that? or How do you feel about cake? I try not to eat carbs but I'd eat chocolate cake for you, how about that?"
But now when he asks I just respond. "Okay-let me know who you want me to talk with today." He gives us all the tools. Brain cancer is a huge tool, I'd prefer something a little smaller- like acne or premature balding- but we use what we are given.
Primary Care Doctor- "Are you generally healthy?"
Jonathan- "Yes, I've always been healthy....
PCD- "that's great!"
Jonathan- "well, except for the brain cancer."
What is your tool?
God is bigger than this and Jesus can fix-it.